Friday, May 27, 2011

Saubhik o Poriborton (Saubhikke jemon dekhiyachi .. ponchom kisti)



E lekhata lekhar konorokom icche amar chilona .. kintu goto du hopta dhore bangla/ingriji kagoj er protibedon .. tv channel er bisleshon ... facebook/orkuter gyangorbho alochona ... choto boro pathyo opathyo sob kichhu pore pore ami klanto, khubdho, bitosroddho, hotash ...  ki byapar bolun to? .. kalighate kolotan .. alimuddine pindodan  ... bameder oudhotyo .. mamatar adhipotyo ... e kochkochi ki jothesto hoini? ..  ar bitonda? ... mamata dan na oti bam .. buddho pagol na buro bham ... ma-mati r mega-joi ki sanksirtik obokkhoi naki  ashonno mohaproloy ... patar por pata cholche to cholchei .. kintu sotti koi ? saubhik koi ? .. ei je marattok palabodol .. e ki saubhik byatito sombhob?  tobe se katha ke bolbe ? kobe ?(1)

Keu jodi nai bolen ... prokhyato oitihashik ar chintabid ra jodi nijeder gojodontominar theke namte na chan ... (o)sadharon manusher itihash ke obogga koren ... tobe ei odhomkei likhte hoi ...

Ar ei poth to saubhik i dekhiyeche ... o jokhon or glittering research career(2) helai tyag kore journalisme mon dilo ... tokhon bolechilo .. "sumanda (suman chattopadhyay) amar pithe hat rekhe bollen ... saubhik .. e nongramir bajare manushke sotyi katha jananor boro dorkar re" .. aj amaro eki  boktobyo ... ei collective amnesia dekheo jodi chup kore thaki ... taile eddin brithai sabhiker sanidhyo pelam ..  tai chakri jai to jak .. na jonmano sontaner bhobishyot biponno hoi to hok ... aj ami itihash rochoyita ...     

11 bochhor ager katha ... 2000 sal ...  

Tokhon amra sobe sobe jadavpure dhukechi .. ar saubhik  presidencyte .. dekha sakkhat puropuri bondho ... saubhik ke jarpornai miss kori ...  kintu ki ar kora ...  saubhik boro hoye gecche .. onek byastota ...

Tobe edik odik khobor petam ... saubhik jake bole presidency mat kore dicche ... chancellor theke chaprashi ... gnatu gold medalist theke felu drug addict ... sobai mohit .. sobar mukhe shudhu ektai nam ... shune khushi hoii ...  khanik hingsheo hoi ... ebhabei din jai ...

Ermodhye ekdin subhadeep bollo, "janis marattok kando .. presi te udum jhamela cholche ... saubhik kishob vote e dnariyechilo ... president na ki ekta hobe ... tarpor khub gondogol hoyeche .. mardanga .. bhangchur .. chnora bneche ki more kono hodish nei" ... bollam, "she ki? jokhom tokhom hoyeche naki?" .. emnite sadharon gundabajite saubhiker je kichhu hobar noi she bhaloi jani ... tobu chinta to hoi .. subhadeep bollo, "na seshob kono khobor nei .. saubhik sompurno bepatta" .. tarpor bollo .. "arekta ajob byapar .. shunlam saubhik naki ekkhana matro vote peyecche" .. eibar puroi ghnete gelam .. saubhiker ja jonopriyota tate protipokkher ektao vote pawai aschorjer bishoi hoto ... saubhik ekta matro vote ki kore pete pare!! ..

Bohubar saubhik ke phone korar chesta holo ..  o kokhonoi bari nei .. kokhon asbe keu janena ... beshi katha jigyesh-o kora jacchena .. ora koddur ki janen to janina ... edike mone proshner pahar ...  saubhik kothai? ki hal? hotat vote e dnaralo keno? kon partyr hoye dnaralo? kara marpit korlo? .. kichui to janina ... presite subhadeeper kicchu chena lokjon chhilo .. tader sobaikeo phone kora holo .. kintu keu i kono soduttor dilena .. amra je timire shei timire ..

Dudin bader katha .. sedin bodhoi shonibar .. sokale adda dicchi ... hothat megh na chaite sunami! .. dekhi saubhik esechhe ... mukhta khub serious .. chowal shokto ...naker pata phola .. kopaler shira phola ... bujhlam byapar gurutoro ... 

Mone hajar proshno chilo .. kintu jigyesh korar kono sujog pelam na ..  saubhik dhukei prochondo  ekta thomthome golai bollo. "toder janiye rakhi ... gotokal sokale ekta ghotona ghoteche ... sfi r gundara tader nokkarjonok byaboharer jonye ekti cheler kacche nisworto khoma chaite badhyo hoyeche" .. bole halka bhrukuti kore ekta juddhong dehi bhab niye dnariye roilo ... amaderi du gha debe bodhoi  ..

Bhoye bhoye bollam.. "ektu khule bol na ... noile to kicchhuti dhorte parchhina " .. tate saubhik ja bolle ta sonkhepe eirom ... presidencyte sfi ar ke ke jeno onekdin dhorei chhori ghoracche .. kono kajer kaj korena .. khali gundami ar noshtami ... edike sob kichu oder kobjai .. phole presir ghor obonoti hocche ...

Ekhon saubhik giye porai oder hoyeche mushkil... saubhiker kacche to ar eisob pnyeaji cholena .. borong saubhiker birodhitai oder sadher dhandabaji bondho hobo hobo .. tai saubhikke atkate ora ja noi tai kore beracche .. eibar election-e saubhik nijer i ekta dol baniye vote-e dnariyechilo (doler namta mone nei .. nagorik naxal ba oidhoroner kicchu) ...  swobhabotoi or joi nischit .. kintu sfi er chnai ra ki ar emni chhere debe! ... phole bedhorok maramari .. bomabaji ..  chhatro-chhatrir kicchuke bhoi dekhiye aste deini .. bakider sotan haspatale pathiyeche ... phole voter somoi ektao lok chilona ... gundar dol nijera nijeder vote diyeche ...


Jigyesh korlam, "tokeo ki mereche naki?" ... saubhik amader dike ekta korunar hashi hashlo ... bollo, "cheyechilo .. marte parle to oder bhaloi hoto .. kintu ..", khanik thamlo .. tarpor, "ami thik korechilam ... ora ja chai koruk .. ami amar voteta debo .. dilam o ...  ar tatei..." .. abar khanik biroti ... tarpor odbhut ekta udash gola kore bollo .."dhor ekta ghore bohukal shudhu ondhokar .. alo dhokar sob rasta bondho ... ondhokare theke theke keu ar janeina alo bole kichu hoi ... krimikiter rajotto .. tader shashon .. tader shashani .. eromi chole ..." ... abar pause .. "tarpor ekdin hothat sob dorja janla churmar... ek muhurte sob alo ..." ei bole prai 3 minit chup .. amra to bhoye mukh khulchina .. kokhon ki befnash boli ar mood ta noshto hoi ... saubhik i abar dhorlo ..."oder sob shoitani sotteo ami jokhon vote ta dilam .. tokhon eiromi holo ..." ... "tarpor tarpor?" .. "tarpor ar ki ...  ora mere dhore shashiye bakider hotiyechilo .. kintu obhabe ki kichu atkai? .. borong bidroher indhon ... tai holo .. baki chele meye keu nei ...ami eka ...  tobu bidroho .. lab-e bidroho .. canteen-e libraryte ... table e chair e test tube e bidroho .. ora bhoi pelo..." ... "tarpor? tarpor?" .. "tarpor ... ki obostha tora bhabteo parbina .. kal sokale ... college dhukchhi .. dekhi jishnuda ... sfi er sobche boro chnai ... amai deke bollo, saubhik .. bujhte parini .. khub bhul hoye geche ... amra khoma chaichhi ..  bollam .. bhalo, tobe koto ar khoma pabe .. khomar o to shima ache .. tomader nirlojjotar moto oshim to noi .. bole beriye aschi ... pichon theke daklo ... ki modhumakha gola! ... saubhik .. ekta rofa korle hoina ... dhor jodi sayanke (sfi r president prarthi) soriye toke president kori ? .. ekta jodi jot... ar dhoirjo rakhte parlamna ... JISHNUDA! .. gorje uthlam ... MORJADAR KONO BHORTUKI HOINA :..."  saubhik thamlo .. dekhlam chokhduto dhikdhik jwolcche ... niswashe fnoshfnosh shobdo .. (3) 

Amader hal tokhon okohotobyo ... gaye kisob khub futchilo .. etokkhon kheyal korini .. ekhon bujhlam seta subhadeeper khara howa lom ... hate ki karone ekta dosh takar note pakacchilam ... dekhi uttejonai seta chnire kutikuti kore felechi ... subhadeep konokrome bollo ..."tarpor ki holo .. ki korbi? ..." saubhik totokkhone beronor jonye toiri .. dorjar kach theke bollo, "dekhi .. ektu bhabi .. kichu ekta korte hobe ... tobe oi je bollam .." sesh ki bollo ar shunte pelam na .. tokhon obostha bhalo na ...

Baki dinta ekrom dombondho uttejonai katlo ..  ar pnachta guruttopurno bishoyer moto politics-er byapareo amader oshamanyo ogyota (4) .. phole alo-ondhokar-krimikit-bidroho kichhu bujhte parini .. matha ghneteghute ekakar ... tobe saubhik bhabbe boleche ... etukui bhorsha ... dher din dekhechi saubhik bhable shokto shokto somoshya joler moto somadhan hoi ...pujor pandale ghurtam jokhon .. dekhtam samne ekta chair .. tate ekta sada baksho .. opore lekha "bonya durgotoder katha ektu bhabun" ... konodin patta di ina ..  sebar saubhik hothat ekta chair niye pashe boshe porlo .. gale hat ... jigyesh korlam, "ki re boshli je? .. paye byatha?" .. saubhik gombhir mukhe bollo, "na bhabchhi" .. tokhon bhebechi iyarki marche .. kintu tarpor thekei dekhi ar oi baksholagano chairgulo thakena .. apnarao kheyal kore dekhte paren .. ajkal ogulo mote dekha jaina ... ki bhebe je bonya durgotoder somoshya somadhan korlo ta janina .. janleo bujhbar khomota amader thorai acche ... kintu saubhik bhable kaj hoi, eta swotosiddho ...

Sedin rate ektuo ghum holo na ... ektu ghor elei  chokher samne dekhchi sari sari test tuber micchil .. backgrounde gumgum kore mike bajche .. "mojadar bhortuki nai .. bhortukihin morjada chai" ... totkhonat tondrabhongo .. gola shukiye khotkhote ... bichhana ghame chopchope ... bhor hote hap chere bnachlam ...

Pordin 11ta nagad saubhik elo ... chokh lal .. chul uskokhushko ... hate ektara kagoj ... kagojer tarata amader dike chnure bollo .. "pore dekh" .. dekhlam lekhata ingrijite .. "sneher pothbhroshto comradegon" bole shuru  ... ar tarpor ! ...ki r boli .. se je ki lekha .. bhashar ki gobhirota! ... tar tulonai ulysses sohojpath .. naipaul chetan bhagat ... ar bhab! .. marx, lenin, mao, trotsky, gandhi, tolstoy, nietshe sob makhomakho .. ekbhage mohenjadoro theke shuru kore aj obdir rajnoitik itihasher sar-dorpon ... onyo bhage agami sat lokkho bocchorer proyojoniyo kormokander nirdesh ... bisheshoto kommonoshtoder bhalo-mondo .. thik-bhul .. glasnost-perestroika .. sob niye ja ta  .. saharai shihoron jare koi ...

Puro lekhata pata ashteker chilo .. amra to dupata porei khabi kheye osthir .. mathai cyclone ... heart attack hoi hoi .. hal cchere dilam ... saubhik bollo, "bujhli kichu?" ... ki ar boli .. "hyan mane na mane oi .." .. saubhik bollo, "thak .. chap nishna .. eta toder jonye noi" .. amra bollam .. "eta ki shei jishnur jonye?.. o bujhbe?" saubhik ekta tacchilyer hashi heshe bollo, "jishnu? .. bujhbe? oi chunoputi! .. huh ..." tarpor abar, "dekhchis na ki cholche ... communismer name arotdari ... byatader gaye mathai shudhu med jomche .. thakbena .. "   

Chunoputite saubhiker utsaho nei .. phole kono raghob-bowaleri pran songshoi setuku bujhechilam ... kintu omon indropoton andaj korini ... khoborta pelam din satek bade ... kagojer headline .. "mukhyomontritto theke jyoti basur podotyag" ... sobai kirom shock peyecchilo she nischoi apnader nischoi mone acche ... jyoti basu podotyag korchen!! .. jyoti basu!?? ... jar jonopriyota ekmatro che guevarar sathe tuloniyo (5) ... jar nam nile prithibishuddhu sromojibi buke bol pai ... knacha jole lal rong dhore, khele mone hoi red wine ... jini mukh khulle pnujibadira thorthor kore knape .. clinton lukobar jonye skirter tola khnujte giye hillary monicai guliye fele ... windows dumadum crash kore (6) ...  jar katha bolte gele borora shudhu "khadyo andolon" obdi uccharon korte paren .. tarporei chokh jole bhore jai .. gola buje ashe ... shei jyoti basu ar mukhyomontri thakben na !! ...   eki sombhob!! .. prithibi dhongsher tobe ar baki ki roilo!! .. koto barite sedin hnari chorlona ... koto union ghor khali pore roilo .. tasher ashor jomlona ... kothin ishwor obishwashi kommonoshtorao bhogobaner kache prathona korte shuru korlo ... jyoti babu jeno fire ashen ..


Kintu swidhanto onor roilo .. amra to jani .. saubhik ja kore bhebei kore .. tar norchor nei ... oke phone korlam ... "ki kore ki korli? kake pathali lekhata? shei politburo (7) na ki bole.. sekhane? dilli gechili?" .. kintu saubhik ki kichu bole .. eke binoyi .. tai montroguptir shopoth niyechilo bodhoi .. phole speakty-not  ... amra bollam, "ebar tobe ki hobe? shunchhi buddhadeb kimba subhas chakkotti mukhyomontri hoben?"... amader to subhash ke pocchondo ..  ki sundor tupi poren .. tachara usha uthhup ke diye jini rabidnrasangeet record koran .. tar kache kichui osadhyo noi .. kintu saubhik bollo,"buddha mukhyomontri hobe" .. "keno? keno? subhash non keno? shunechi jyotibabur naki okei pocchondo".. saubhik bollo, "nah !!... budhhai hobe .. karon ache ..." tarpor ektu theme bollo, "ekhono jyotibabur pochondo niye chinta .. huh" ... bujhlam etao paka hoye geche ... shudhu ghoshonar opekkha ... jigyesh korlam .."ta tui ekhon ki korbi? kicchu ki sotyi bodol hobe?" .. saubhik subinoyi ..  "ami? ami ki korte pari?" bole ektu hashlo, tarpor "dekh bodlai kina ... 10 bocchor somoi pabe ..khanik guidance ..  tate na hole .." .. sediner moto katha sesh ..   
 
Erpore buddhababu hoi hoi kore mukhyomontri hoye gelen .. ar tarpor .. sobkichu durbar gotite bodlate laglo .. gramgonjer katha toto janina .. kintu kolkatai je ki na ki holo!! ..  flyover pore flyover ... ekhane rasta okhane apish ... sorkari apishe luncher pore gele chhuti kata .. emon ki taxi refusal porjonto bondho hoye gelo  ... sokoler mone she ki utsaho! ... poriborton i poriborton ..

Eishob ek ekta bhalo khobor pai .. ar nijeder modhye aurai "saubhik saubhik" .. ar kei ba esob korte parto! ... keu keu bolben je ja korar korle to buddhadeber dolbol .. er modhye saubhik elo kottheke .. ki iba boli .. soja pothe bhaba oneker kachei shokto .. karur karur kache osombhob  .. tobu du ekta jinish bhabun .. tokhon montrisobhai ke prodhan? .. buddhababu .. rajyo committee te ke prodhan? .. anil biswas .. kintu erai keno? ... aro bhabun .. buddhababu r meye kothai porto? .. presidency .. anil babur meye? .. presidency .. saubhik kothai porto? or biplob kothay shuru hoyechilo? .. aro bolte hobe? ..

Eirom khushir din cholte thakle kodinei je poschimbongo phule phole bhore jeto ta nissondeho ... kintu ta ki hoi ? .. kobi bolechen "bhalo kaje bishom badha .. krishno sathe bolo radha" .. saubhiker samne badhar poriman din din bartei laglo .. kintu tar thekeo beshi elo birokti ar klanti ... shunechi bidyasagar ajibon manusher bhalo korar phole becharir emon dosha hoyechilo je sesh boyesh ar shohure sobhyo lokjon soite partenna .. saontalder majhe giye chilen ... saubhiker o serom i holo .. khobor pelam je nagorik jibone o bhoyanok klanto .. phuchkai oruchi .. flyover e allergy .. metrote claustrophobia ... saubhik kolkata chere dilo .. shantiniketoner shanti kunje asroi nite ...

Kolkatai tokhon ek odbhut bishonnota ... karur mon bhalo nei ... modhusudoner bhashai obostha jeno .. "jobe shyammoni, chhariya she brojokul, gela modhupure" (8) ...  ar tokhon thekei bamfronter tothtakothito unnoyonshil sorkar je ki rate-e makhate shuru korlo se nischoi alada kore bolte hobena .. nehat saubhik 10 bocchor somoi diyechilo .. tai se jatra electionta bneche gelo .. nochet victory ar vanisher aschorjo wit shonar sujog pawa jetona ..

Saubhik tokhono swechha-nirbashone .. shanitniketoner ucchoshikkhar por ucchotoro gobeshonai mogno .. iisc te .. shohure osobhyotar onekdure... nobel pabo pabo korche ...

Kintu koddin ar eibhabe chole .. onacharero to sima acche ... amar apnar nahoi chokher chamra nei .. shirdarai elastic .. sob i shoi .. tai bole saubhik ki pare? ... manusher pashe na dnariye or upai i ba ki ... tai nobel sthogito roilo ... saubhik kolkata fire eshe procharmadhyomer hal dhorlo ... ar procharmadhyom je bam sorkarer ki dosha korlo !! .. seto sobari jana  ..

Seshbelai ekta golpo acche .. er gurutto hoito aj dhora porbena .. tobu bhobishyoter jonye ekta drishtanto bolei bolchi .. protibar electioner moto eibaro buddha-mamata saubhiker kache dhorna diyechilo  .. (swabhabik .. kurukhetro hobe ar arjun-durjodhon keshto ke ignore korbe e ki hoi naki!) ... dujonei oke dole pete chai ... saubhik janai je or karur proti i otirikto pokkhopat nei .. dujonkei choice dei  .. hoi or voteta nin ba bakita ... swabhabik karonei buddha saubhiker vote ta chai ...  krishnoke pele ar kei ba narayani senar toakka kore .. ar saubhiker ekta vote e ki hote pare .. sheto presidencyr electioner somoi thekei sobar jana ..

Er pore ki holo to dekheichen .. exit poll .. opinion poll .. pnijrapol .. je jai boluk .. buddha-biman nischit .. oder joi onibarjo ... vote baksho khullei dekha jabe saubhiker shei ekta vote kemon ogunti hoye baki sob kichu dheke diyecche .. jotoskrishno toto joyo! ...

Kintu saubhik ke dhora ki etoi soja! ... o bohudin dhorei dekhche shashokera manusher katha ar bhabenna ... byakti dol esob i prodhan ... tai buddher samne ekta cchotto porikkha rekhechilo ... byakti na somosti ... ek na onek .. konta neben? ... buddha bojhen ni .. sobai ke fele diye saubhikkei bachhlen .. oitihshiker pore ebar pouranik bhul ... bas ar ki! .. bam durgo maya hoye gelo!... karjokhetre dekha gelo saubhiker vote ektai .. bakider voter sathe kono parthokyo nei ... bimanbabur onko lute lobongo ...

Janina apnara dhorte parchen kina .. kintu eje ki aschorjo atmotyag! ... jara chhaposha tara byapok  hobe bhabe .. swopno dekhe ... felu chele eksho pabe .. rikshaola birla hobe .. gablooaine goppo likhbe .. pondosrom .. amra tobu ashkara di .. aha chesta to korchhe! ..  kintu ultota bhabun .. jara ononyo .. jara odwitiyo .. tader nijeke sadharoner store namiye ana ki aro shokto, aro obishwashyo noi ??... tendulkar ki amar moto bat korte parbe? abdul karim khan onjon dutter moto gaite? .. tobei bhebe dekhun ... saubhik ghosher vote .. tar gunti ek ... ghonoshyam gorai kimba debdulali dashir vote .. tar-o gunti ek ... bhaba jai!! ... prokrito samyobader er theke boro udahoron ar ki iba hote pare! .. ar kotota oshadharon hole emon sadharontto orjon kora jai? .. .. oguntike eke namano jai (9).. she amar bodher baire ...  e ek saubhik i pare .. ek saubhik i kore dekhiyeche .. bishwo itihashe benojir

Tai bondhugon .. jara ei itihash porlen, janlen (mane bore hoye kete porenni ar ki) .. ashun aj ei oithashik poribortoner muhurte... faltu kheyokheyi bhule ... somosto songrami o lyadkhor jonotar torof theke saubhik ke janai ramdhonu kurnish ...

Hori bol ...



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1) Jeno kurukhetrer juddho seshe loker proshno ..  oi nil ronger lokta ke moshai? .. mathai morog jhnuti? circus party naki ? ... o eparai keno? ...

2) Aha! ajo nature ar science-r editor ra bolaboli koren .. ekta chele chilo bote bajare ... kothai je gelo ..

3) Kheyal kore dekhun .. ajibon onekke bolte, phishphish korte, chnechate shunechen nischoi .. kintu gorje uthte? ami to konodin na .. sadhe ki saubhik saubhik ... 

4) Jodio chotobela thekei amader marxbad, gandhibad, monaobotabad, oshatyobad .. sober i sikkha dewar chesta hoyeche .. kintu kicchu loker mulyoban somoi borbad chhara labh kichu hoini .. amader niret khuli obhedyo .. subidhabad i pontha ..

5) Shudhu t-shirt bikkiri dhorle che ek nombor .. kintu tupi, moja, potaka, kombol  sob dhorle jyoti babui prothom .. icmf, 2009 er listi 1) jyoti basu, 2) che, 3) maradona, 4) chengis khan .. 8) mao .. 29) lenin .. 952) marx ...   

6) Ei bhoyetei to software companygulo  poshchimbonge aste chaitona ... shala burjowa bill gates ..

7) Accha politburo byaparta ki ?... politokesh birddhoder goshthi bolei ki omon nam? .. ajonmoi mone hoi .. kintu jigyesh korar sahosh hoina .. poriborton jokhon eloi tokhon keu ektu kholsa korle bhalo hoi ..

8) Nigghat bhul quote korcchi .. tobe apnarao nischoi meghnad bodh gnatiye rakhenni .. pagol na gautam haldar ..

9) Ultota ... orthat ek ke onek kora ta amra khanik khanik jani ... mamatar bhashai "scientific rigging" ...
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Oprashongik A :  Ajkal poribortoner bajare bohu lok i rong bodlacche... amar onek bamponthi bondhu ei byapare khub khubdho .. taderke janai je ami mote eisober modhye nei .. shei chottobela theke jani sob kichur jonye cpm dayi ... dale nun beshi .. cpm er dosh ..  porikkhai proshno common poreni .. cpm er dosh ... emon ki lal badshah bole cinemta jokhon hu ha flop korlo .. amar ghor amitabhpremi mama bolechilen .. "shalar cpm er rajye r ki iba hobe ... sob laler theka orai niye rekheche .. onyo kono lal cholte debena" .. shesob biswash ajo otut ... tai bamponthi bondhuder amar torof theke blanket ashwash .. trinamul 500 bocchor rajotto korleo "pagol na cpm" i bolbo .. pagol na trinamul kodacho noi ...

Oprashongik B : Shunchi kolkata london hobe .. khub ashar katha .. khali ektai chinta .. ebar theke ki tobe bari jete visa lagbe ? .. saubhik dekhis baba .. ar jai kor .. eite korisne .. visai boro bhoi pai ..

5 comments:

Rajarshi said...

pagla kheer kha...etai best...

Gabloo said...

@rajarshi ... thanku thanku ..

Arunava Patra said...

anekdin bNeche thk bhai...anekdin aro moni manikko chora...

Gabloo said...

@arunava .. thanku :)

Anonymous said...

etao darun. kintu jishnuda to sfi korto na!